A Chance at Life

“What were you thinking? How could you be so stupid! I really can’t believe you, Annie! You’ve got to get rid of it! I do not want kids, I thought I had made myself clear!” Lucas’ words echoed in Annie’s mind just as if he had screamed them into the Grand Canyon.

“Get an abortion… Get an abortion… Get an abortion…” Annie rubbed her temples and tried to erase the angry voice tormenting her every thought.

“I am leaving to go back offshore tomorrow, ”Annie recalled Lucas saying through gritted teeth, “when I get back in 21 days you had better done whatever you need to do to rid yourself of your burden. God so help me if I come back and you are still pregnant. I can promise you, you do not want to even try to imagine what I will do to you. Do you hear me, Annie?”

Annie shivered, pushing the memory out of her mind. How had her life come to this? How had she come to find herself at the place she was now. It certainly isn’t how she thought her life would go, especially after she met Lucas.

He was everything she had ever dreamed of: smart, funny, good looking and the life of the party. From the first moment she met him she knew she was gone. Even after he asked to buy her a drink she never dreamed she had a chance with a man like him.

Annie sat at the coffee house table loathing the day she met him and trying to determine her next step. She had a list of abortion clinics pulled up on her phone and her heart was racing as Lucas’ voice haunted her mind. Somewhere inside of her she felt a stabbing in her conscience that this was not the answer, yet the last three words he said rang in her ears. “Get an abortion.”

Susan walked into the coffee house with a strange sense of urgency and confusion as to what it could possibly mean. After the phone call from the doctor’s office she felt so empty inside. “I’m sorry, your test results came back negative,” she recalled those words so clearly. Why did I let myself build up my hopes? Why did I not just give up? Maybe it is just not God’s plan that I be a mother, she thought.

The urgency returned and she looked around. As her eyes fell on the petite redhead at the back corner table she knew that was her reason even if she didn’t know why. Susan bought a coffee and walked toward Annie praying for direction and guidance and as she approached her she caught a glimpse of her phone screen.

“Hi, may I share a table with you? It’s awfully crowded in here today.”

Annie looked up, startled, into the kindest eyes she had ever seen. “Yes, ma’am, let me move things out of your way.” ...

Walking into the abortion clinic brought about a feeling of nausea that Annie had not anticipated. She told herself it was just the morning sickness, trying her best to push Susan’s voice out of her head as it begged her to not do this. Between the voices of Lucas and Susan she thought she was going to lose her mind. Then the voice of the receptionist, signaling it was her turn, interrupted the war going on in her head and another wave of nausea hit her. Biting her lip she forced herself forward as the threats Lucas made resounded in her head.

“Alright Ms. Harper, just lie back and Dr. Turnkien will be in shortly,” a voice from off in the distance said. Swallowing hard, Annie tried her best to drown out the voices and sounds. All of them. She complied with the nurse physically, however it was all she could do to not to scream from the torment her mind was going through. “ ‘Don’t do it, Annie, please!’, ‘Get rid of it!’, ‘Don’t worry, we’ll take care of everything.’, “I’ll take care of you and the baby, please, Annie! Please let me help you!’, ‘We can help, you are too young to have such a great responsibility.’”

Suddenly a voice that trumped all the other voices called out. “Leave. Now.” The words were spoken with such authority, Annie started.

“Are you okay, dear?” one of the nurses asked with surprise at Annie’s recoil.

“I have to go. Let me up. Let me up! Now!” Annie was all but screaming.

“Miss, it’s okay. We will take care of you, please let us help you.”

“No! No! I have to leave! I have to get out of here!”

Ripping off the monitors, Annie jumped off the examining table. Her eyes were such a blur of tears she could barely see where she was going. She grabbed her things, got herself together and all but ran out of the building not even sure where she was going. Oblivious to what was going on in the streets, she ran...

“Susan, this is Annie. Can... Can you help me? I didn’t do it, Susan. I didn’t! I couldn’t, I just couldn’t.” Sobbing she continued, “ The voices, the voices were driving me mad! Then, then a voice like I have never heard before, I don’t know where it came from, it said to leave, to leave right then. I couldn’t ignore it! I left. What am I going to do now?! Lucas is going to kill me! What if he really kills me? He said get rid of it! I couldn’t Susan, I just couldn’t do it!”

“Where are you at Annie? I will come get you, just tell me where you are.” Susan responded with more calm than she had felt since she sat in that coffee shop listening to Annie’s story. “Okay, I’ll meet you at the coffee shop. Don’t worry, I will have James arrange to get your things from the apartment. You will never have to see him again. I will get you a new phone; leave yours there that way he can’t trace you. I promise, I will take care of you.” Susan hung up the phone while putting on her shoes and grabbing her purse; and she prayed...

“Susan, are you awake? I think it’s time.” Annie whispered from the hallway and she was met with an ecstatic response that made her giggle.

Placing her hands on her very round belly, she could not help but think of how her heart was full of a love she could not have imagined seven months ago. At her lowest point God sent her a lifeline in the form of Susan Rickles, who would very soon become the mother of the child she was carrying. That thought brought another smile to her face as she remembered how overjoyed Susan and James were when she asked if they would adopt her baby. Another contraction brought her back to the reality that today they would journey this new road together.

“James! Get the car! Did you get the luggage? What about the car seat? Are you okay, Annie? Hurry, James, hurry!”

Laughing between contractions Annie responded, “It’s okay, we have time. Doctor Emery said I didn’t even need to come to the hospital until at least an hour after my contractions begin. We will be okay and not drive James crazy in the process.”

Susan smiled, hugged Annie and turned to James, “I’m sorry, I am just a tad bit nervous.”

James in turn hugged them both and let them know all was well, but he too was a bit nervous and would feel better when they made it to the hospital. With that, he ushered the ladies to the car while he prayed silently for a safe delivery.

“I honestly don’t think I have ever seen a delivery go as smoothly as yours did, Annie.” Dr. Emery said when she walked into the room. “You had the most peaceful disposition all throughout it. How are you feeling today?”

“I feel much better than I anticipated. I am a little sore, but the joy in my heart watching Susan and James with their baby overrides everything else.”

“They are certainly over the moon. What did they name him?”

“They let me name him, actually. Elais Zayd Rickles. We joke his nickname will end up being “Easy” as a play on his initials. Elais means ‘Yahweh is life giving’ and Zayd means ‘victory, success, and triumph.’”

Soberly, Annie continued, “He actually saved my life. It’s a long story, but in short, I was on a path of self destruction and this child brought about a chain of events that brought me to the knowledge of a loving God who wanted me to know that I wasn’t alone and there was hope. While I know I am in no place to take care of him like I know I should, I know Susan and James are. We chose to have an open adoption, Susan really thought that would be best for us all.”

“Amazing story,” Dr. Emery said, clearing her throat and wiping her eyes, “thank you for sharing. I was adopted too. It is one of the reasons that I chose to become a doctor. I wanted to share in the joys of life. Roe vs Wade had some people pushing my birth mother to end my life because of how I was conceived, but she was persistent that two wrongs didn’t make a right. At seventeen she knew she would never be able to care for me like I deserved and she let her Mother’s sister adopt me. She taught me that no matter the circumstances life throws at you, God will prove Himself faithful. You just keep trusting Him, Annie, He will do to depend on all the days of your life.”

Looking over at Susan and James holding Elias, Annie replied with tears of joy,

“Yes, ma’am, He surely has proven Himself faithful to me.”